THe HUGE group project

I have been working all day, not kidding, all day, on a group project for school with one of my group mates. I spent about 3 hours last night on it too. The other group mate is conspicuously absent. I am not naming names. You know him, you love him. Yes, I am naming names...Mr. Brady. To this group project, he has contributed one small bit, and it is plagiarized so I am not including it. This project is going to be around 40 pages worth of writing. This is what I have learned so far: my group mate's son took 25 pies to the face at the halloween carnival today. My higher education dollars at work!

Wish that was me,

Normal Girl

Spring Beads

I made these yesterday for my Bead Unique column for spring. My editor rejected them. Waaaaa. They are pretty cute, I think. So now, what will I do with them??? So many possibilities....

Funny to be thinking about spring?

Normal Girl

The Coffee Habit

I know this is not a good picture, I took it while on my morning walk with my phone. The woman in the pic is power walking with a cup of coffee. She was seriously walking, my friends. I have seen this trend where I live. I am not judging, but am asking...really? Is the coffee addiction so strong that you have to have it while you are power walking? I don't drink coffee, and I could understand taking water or gatorade with you, but coffee? Someone explain this?

I can barely manage walking. Walking and drinking at the same time???

Normal Girl

Church Bulletin Announcements

I don't know if this speaks to the kind of day I am having, or my third grade sense of humor, or what, but I really did laugh at these. Out loud. Announcements from church bulletins: -------------------------- Ladies, don't forget the rummage sale. It's a chance to get rid of those things not worth keeping around the house. Bring your husbands. -------------------------- Remember in prayer the many who are sick of our community. Smile at someone who is hard to love. Say 'Hell' to someone who doesn't care much about you. -------------------------- Don't let worry kill you off - let the Church help. -------------------------- Miss Charlene Mason sang 'I will not pass this way again, ' giving obvious pleasure to the congregation. -------------------------- For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs. -------------------------- Next Thursday there will be tryouts for the choir. They need all the help they can get. -------------------------- At the evening service tonight, the sermon topic will be 'What Is Hell?' Come early and listen to our choir practice. -------------------------- Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children. -------------------------- Please place your donation in the envelope along with the deceased person you will want remembered. -------------------------- The church will host an evening of fine dining, super entertainment and gracious hostility. -------------------------- Potluck supper Sunday at 5:00 PM - prayer and medication to follow. -------------------------- This evening at 7 PM there will be a hymn singing in the park across from the Church. Bring a blanket and come prepared to sin. -------------------------- Ladies Bible Study will be held Thursday morning at 10 AM. All ladies are invited to lunch in the Fellowship Hall after the B. S. Is done. -------------------------- The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the Congregation would lend him their electric girdles for the pancake breakfast next Sunday. -------------------------- The Associate Minister unveiled the church's new campaign slogan last Sunday: 'I Upped My Pledge so up yours.'

My church bulletin is never this much fun,

Normal Girl

They Don't Make 'Em Like That Anymore

I got this picture last night from my friend, the VP of Selling Buttons. I made this Christmas dress for her daughter 20 years ago. Why in the world does she still have it? And why is it so huge? Maybe it has grown in 20 years. Anyway, it made me laugh!

Rudolph Rocks,

Normal Girl

Shoe Shopping

Vacuum shoes. I don't know how they work, but I am saying to you Wonder Woman, if everyone in your house had a pair of these, you would never need to use a vacuum cleaner again!

Electricity Generating Shoes. They are advertised to generate electricity while you walk....enough to power your iPod. Really good if you keep losing your charger cord, like I do.

These are apparently the rage with teens in Japan. When you break you ankle walking in them, you will have a handy game boy while you are sitting in a chair waiting for it to heal.

I think your Mom would like these.

MP3 Shoes. Play your music over the speakers or use them wirelessly with your headphones. What happens when you get caught in the rain or the sprinkler?

Not only are these flip flops waterproof, they are booze proof.

GPS Shoes. You have heard of the gift that keeps on giving. This is the gift to which you keep on giving. They will cost you $200 and an additional $10 every month. But, you will never get lost! Well, until you step in a puddle or kick something too hard. Do you think they talk to you like the GPS in your car?

You are probably not going to buy these shoes, but I had to include them. They are made specifically for prostitutes. I wonder how large a market that is. They have an alarm in case you get into trouble. They have hidden compartments for your keys and cash and other small tools of the trade. There is a little computer screen that runs a blog for you. You and your fellow workers can input problem clients, so you always have a running list of them. Kind of like checking ID before you get to work, I guess. And there is a GPS in case you lose your corner.

The Human PinBall is in China right now. If you need any of these for Christmas presents, she can probably find them for you there. Order now!

I love shoes,

Normal Girl

Is Average Like Normal?

The kids like this website. Sometimes I go and read just to laugh. I like witty people and witty stories.

The other day, my friends were practicing writing their names with their left hand. I wrote mine and they were all telling me how good it was. I'm left-handed. MLIA

Today, we had a test in Science Class. One question was "How do you delay the speed at which milk turns sour?". I didn't know the answer, so I wrote "Keep it in the cow". Full credit was awarded. MLIA.

Today, I was in a common area on campus when a guy who had been playing songs by The Fray started playing the Addams family theme. All the students in the room, without looking up from their books and laptops, snapped at all the right places. I love college. MLIA

Go read.

Is average the same as normal?

Average Normal Girl

Missionary Bracelets

Bead soup party tonight. We made over 40 bracelets to put in the missionary cupboard at church. Each year we have a bead soup party and make bracelets to put in the cupboard. When our missionaries come home, they may go to the cupboard and take what they need. It is stocked with all kinds of necessities and gifts. We have sent bracelets all over the world to women in bible studies with our missionaries. It is a fun night for us, and hopefully some encouragement for other women...wherever they are.

Wondering in what countries our bracelets will show up,

Normal Girl

The Fabric of my Life

I got some new fabric today. It is going to be my new Bible cover. Love it. Stay tuned.

Normal Girl

All I Need are 30 Cats

I walked into Michaels this afternoon an inspired, creative artist...and left, the crazy cat lady. Minus the cats. I am working on some projects for a vendor. So, I took my approved drawings in to buy all the fun stuff I need to make them.

It became apparent that I am just not hanging out at Michaels like I used to. They had nothing! I have never worked with this vendor before I don't know how much I can change things they have already approved. I caught myself walking the aisles talking to myself. I mean, come on! I needed orange glitter. Where and when would you expect to be able to buy orange glitter? Michaels in October???? Pink beads. Is that to much to ask? Argh, it was very frustrating. And kind of funny to catch myself acting like a crazy person.

Still muttering to myself,

Normal Girl

State of the Union

It does not warrant description, except to say:

job ???

school !!!

ministries ...

sigh,

Normal Girl

Praise in Motion

Dance rehearsals have started again. I have last year's new girls and some even newer girls. None are dancers. And they are so cute! They are taking it very seriously. They are even practicing during the week. I caught two practicing on the stage today after church. They are having fun and I am enjoying them.

I needed this,

Normal Girl

Type A

One fall tree in the park. The overachiever of the plant world. Just like the kid who always raises his hand first in class.... the guy who has to win every game.... the girl that has to have the newest fashions first....

Autumn is a competition.

Normal Girl

Homecoming Niece 3

Isn't it a shame what a short little pipsqueak she is? Of course the big heels don't hurt. She could hardly walk in them. Literally. When I questioned the sanity in that, she said she just has to get to the school. Then the girls all take off their shoes, and put them in the shoe room. They spend the whole dance barefoot. I have three things to say about that:

1. Why spend all that money for shoes if you are not even going to wear them?

2. That room sounds like a good place to go shoe shopping.

3. Dancing barefoot with teenage boys wearing their dress up shoes? Ouch....

Oh well, I guess cute matters when the football team can't win on homecoming.

Normal Girl

Girl's Night In Art Night

Meet Superman. He is showing us that even though he is superman, he has the spidey web coming out of his hand. Your all purpose super hero. Feel safe.

When not making art, everyone sat and played a game. There was lots of hollering out answers, it sounded fun.

We had great snacks made by the ladies of our church. We had enough that we were able to leave some for them to eat over the weekend. Pumpkin bars, rice crispie treats, brownies, and cookies. Good, since making art requires chocolate.

Three of us had the same birthday today. See birthday girl #1. Everyone likes her best. You can tell by the cash people pinned to her shirt during the day.

Birthday girl #2. No cash. I told her not to be sad, at least she was not the oldest. I won that title amongst the birthday girls.

So everyone left with a small hanging canvas. They did a little collage and added a verse, "I know the plans I have for you, declared the Lord. (Jeremiah 29:11) I don't know anyone who cannot find encouragement in that!

All in all, except for the fact that it was 120 degrees in there, it was a fun night.

Normal Girl

Pick Me!

I saw this on facebook this morning and it gave me an idea....

I am looking for a job. Would this be better than a resume? Should I make my own video? Here is my script. Picture it:

• In this line of work, you need design skills as well as instincts Check this out. (a crowd of people are shopping for jewelry at a big show, milling around. I pull out one necklace, and the whole crowd comes over to ooh and ahh and place orders) That's why you pick me.

• Watch this. Michaels corporate offices. Twelve vendors. Twelves sales/marketing teams. One choice. (the buyer comes in, ignores everyone but me and invites me to come into her office) Pick me.

• Seriously. How many reasons do you need to pick me to grow your business? Honestly, I could do this all day. (sitting at my desk in my studio taking phone calls. Yes, I can make and write a blog for your grass roots marketing plan. Of course I can design a new line for you that the buyers will love and have it ready in a month. No problem, I am happy to write an education program for your new line of jewelry findings.) I'd pick me.

• They've been asking me to do this all day. Check it out. OK, one more time. (I quickly sketch three unique bracelet designs) That's three reasons to pick me. Your move.

Would it work, do you think? I just need a filmmaker.

Thinking.........

Normal Girl